Can someone please pass the jelly?

Does anybody remember those commercials? Well, of course nobody does (especially since I’m the only one reading these nowadays) that name brand went out the window a loooong time ago. But there are quite a few other name brands of gimmicky crap that I also miss, most notably Grey Poupon (Which I used to call Gray Poop On, as I’m sure many other unctuous, ugly fat kids my age probably also called it as they slammed the back of the jar with their fat palm and got it all over their striped Lacoste shirt as well as their Pop Tart and ham sandwich)

Like, what ever happened to Osh Gosh Bigosh, or Bugle Boy, or the band They Might Be Giants? Whatever happened to responsibilities (Oops, that one slipped) or Diamond Dallas Paige, or, or, or…Well, pretty much ANYTHING besides Proactive and Diddy.

I miss those days.

Those days without Proactive and Diddy. I look upon them fondly and adoringly. Not to mention with a whole lot of Gray Poop On all over my salami and provolone sandwiches.